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Doctors Are Human, Too?
Kendra Campbell -- The past few weeks of my life have been a bit of a blur. I am in the middle of taking all my final exams for this semester, and I’ve had a lot of personal issues to deal with at the same time. I made a bad decision a week ago, and I’ve been dealing with the fallout since then. All the issues swirling around in my life have really shaken me up a bit, and I feel like I’m on unsteady ground. I can’t help but feel guilt about all the problems that I’ve recently had.
I’ve been asking myself why I’m subjecting myself to the torture of medical school. Of course, I have many answers to this question, but it’s easy for them to fade away in the background of all the other things going on in my life. The real question I’ve found myself asking is, “How can I be a doctor and role model to others, if my own life is in such disarray?”
I guess I've had a belief that doctors are somehow superior humans, and that they don’t have the same problems and crises that everyone else has. When I think about it, I realize that this is a completely false belief, but I have it at times nonetheless. A part of it may be that I don’t come from a family of doctors. In fact, I will be the first person in my entire family to become a doctor. I didn’t grow up with any friends who were doctors, so I really know very little about their personal lives. I’m sure this contributes to my putting them up on pedestals and forgetting that they are people just like anyone else.
I feel very torn on the whole issue. On one hand, I feel like as a doctor, I need to be a role model, and be someone who deals with all their problems efficiently, and leaves their personal life at home. But on the other hand, I realize that, try as I might, I’m going to have problems, and I’ll always be far from perfect. The problem is trying to reconcile these two opposing beliefs. Why should I feel guilty about not living up to certain standards? I guess it’s my own standards that really matter. The problem is that they can be unfairly high at times.
I do wonder if it would be different for me if I had grown up with someone in my life that I watched go to medical school, and whom I could really know as a role model. Would that have made a difference in my perception of doctors? If I had come from a family of doctors, would it be easier for me to remember that doctors are just people too?
August 9, 2007 in Kendra Campbell | Permalink
Comments
Hey Kendra... Good luck and I know how you feel!
I was in the same position believing that you have to perfect and competent at everything in order to be a good doctor..In fact I feel the more human a doctor is the better. Alot of fear is generated by patients because they feel that doctors are so superior to the rest of the human and coming from an extendend family were I'm going to be the 15th doctor once I qualify I know that we are subject to all the same laws, crises and heartache as everyone else. The most important thing is not to let medicine become your life because you'll find it difficult to operate "in the real world" It's easy to forget this especially with the workload students, interns and residents face.At the end of the day you need to look back and satisfied at the contribution you made to the world and not only in the sphere of medicine but in life ans a whole, whether it be by being a good friend, parent , doctor or wife or helping the elderly women cross the street, if you have done something that brightened someone else's day that is enough and you have done good.
Now that the Oprah moment is over:)
Good luck and don't lose heart, 2nd year was very difficult for me both academically and personally so much so that I wanted to drop out of med school. I'm so glad I stuck it out though because it's going so much better now. Have a friend you can talk to about your problems it helped me alot..
Take care
Posted by: Kavi | Aug 10, 2007 7:10:52 AM
Doctors are like super heroes, sort of. What I mean is that one presents them selfs a certain way in front of patients to instill confidence so they let you stick them with a big ass needle or what ever. But on your own time you have all the problems that every one else does. It just so happens that a lot of people are wearing the same disguise that you are.
Posted by: Ken | Aug 14, 2007 2:51:27 PM
A lot of people do hold doctors and other health professionals to a higher standard. This is to be expected, but when it really comes down to it, one should realize that no one is perfect and it matters more HOW you deal with a decision that ended up not being the correct one. A good role model does their best to make the right decision, but also knows what to do with a bad decision.
Posted by: Andrew | Aug 15, 2007 11:36:56 AM
Yeah, I know this feeling, too. I think choosing medicine was the biggest mistake I could ever make. There are no doctors in my family, too. So I didn't know what I was doing when I applied for a medical university.
Posted by: Byurakn | Aug 16, 2007 2:29:40 AM
I know what your feeling. I come from a family of doctors and the only thing that i can tell you is that doctors have the same or worse problems than everyone else. The difference is that in front of the pt you put your disguise of super heroe no matter how you are feeling a the time. After that you can be a NORMAL PERSON. Normal means with a lot of problems jeje
Posted by: JG | Aug 16, 2007 7:22:10 PM
Hey Kendra,
How are you? Your story is very much similiar to mine. I too belonged to a non-medico family. presently I have completed my graduation and pursuing post graduation in surgery, I've got married six months back and I am dealing with my personal and professional lives perfectly.I think doctors really have a higher place in the society but they need to maintain a perfect balance in their personal and professional life,giving more attention to the one that require it, not to mention family support that is must in any profession.Best wishes to you
Posted by: Dr. Sudhi | Aug 22, 2007 7:14:08 AM
Hi Kendra
thanks a lot for sharing your feelings.
i think it's not important what profession you have.
in every profession you are yourself with special personal problem with a layer of your profession.
good luck on your effort
Posted by: sahand | Sep 12, 2007 8:37:36 AM
