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Great Medical Acronyms
Ben Ferguson -- We all know the pedestrian medical acronyms and abbreviations -- bid, CXR, DNR, po, HMO, PE, AAA, CABG, appy, GSW, INR, lap chole. Pretty much anything and everything is acronymous or abbreviated in medicine these days, and if you’re not in the loop, you can go for entire conversations without knowing what the heck someone is talking about. Therefore, it’s important to stay up to date.
Here are some my favorites I’ve heard that are a bit more ... creative?
LGFD: looks good from door
LOLFDGB: little old lady, fall down go boom
CKS: cute kid syndrome
LFTWM: looking for three wise men (pregnant patient vehemently denying sexual activity)
CROACC: cannot rule out anything -> correlate clinically (often by radiologists)
UBI: unexplained beer injury
DBI: dirtbag index (roughly, tattoo count X missing teeth count = days since bathing)
LOBNH: lights on but nobody home
ECU: eternal care unit (dead)
TFTB: too fat to breathe
OBECALP: placebo backwards
OMGWTFBBQ: badly mangled patient, e.g. from MVA (among other things)
CCFCCP: cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs (a little demented)
LMC: low marble count
CTD: circling the drain (a patient expected to die at any moment)
WNL: we never looked
Got any others? Post them in a comment. I’ve come to the conclusion that this sort of creativity is absolutely limitless.
(I found two more comprehensive lists here and here, but they are a bit more on the profane/unprofessional side, as often seems to be any bored doctor’s want. Word to the wise.)
April 3, 2008 in Ben Ferguson | Permalink
Comments
Spot on. (Time spent in ER teaches you many things!) Unfortunalely I only know ones unsuitable for this forum...
Posted by: Elsje | Apr 3, 2008 8:31:40 AM
Unprofessional? Eah. I'll be professional when my patients are professional, too.
Posted by: Jared | Apr 3, 2008 10:50:55 AM
hilarious! :D but so true
Posted by: ditzydoctor | Apr 6, 2008 12:21:23 AM
Great List! This gave me the much needed smile for tonight´s shift. Unfortunately those acronyms are quite unuseable for me, working in germany. Maybe I´ll try to translate/adopt some of them into german. Does anyone know a list of german medical acronyms ?
Posted by: TJay | Apr 8, 2008 3:22:35 PM
You can learn a lot from a county hospital...
WITPOMS: Why Is This Patient On My Service?
Posted by: cs | Apr 8, 2008 3:37:07 PM
DFO(D): done fell over (dead)
ADR: ain't doin' right
FTD: fixin' to die
ID10T: pronounced "i-dee-ten-tee," and to look at it you get the idea
HOP or DC: house of pain/death camp = nursing home
(can you tell at this point I'm sort of from farming stock?)
Also, not really an acronym, but a very descriptive term for a person who presents with the intent to sue someone (ie tripped on the sidewalk at Safeway and they'll be paying for my injuries even if I don't really have any) is called a "Lerner" or "Bernstein" fracture (the names being prominent local ambulance-chasing attorneys). Then there's "incarceritis," a sudden onset of serious (but definitely feigned) symptoms upon being arrested, with the obvious intent. Finally, to "road test" a drunk patient is to send them up and down a hallway in the ER, at which point you can turf them home; if they fail, they get to stay in the gurney for another couple hours hugging an emesis basin and their banana bag. The phrase can also be used to differentiate between a drunken woman who is truly ataxic and one who just can't walk because she's wearing some serious f***-me heels.
My EMT husband is an equal-opportunity offender so he has a slew of acronyms that are largely unprofessional and equally illustrative of the situation at hand.
Posted by: Amy | Apr 8, 2008 4:45:22 PM
FOB: Found on Bench
FLK: Funny Looking kid (usually fetal alcohol)
DIC: Death is coming
Posted by: Lou | Apr 8, 2008 4:53:41 PM
An OB in town here used to put DUB on charts for Damn Ugly Baby
Posted by: ma | Apr 8, 2008 8:37:11 PM
Try these from Florida-
Lobster - sunburned patient
Burger - sunburned patient with ruptured blisters
FURB - Funny, Unusual, Rectal Blockage (examples abound here - use your imagination)
Posted by: Lee | Apr 9, 2008 5:55:20 AM
I think these are the funniest acronyms I've ever seen and (though I hate to admit it) I've been around the internet a very long time.
I think my favorite is CCFCP, which is a term I use a lot. Thanks for the laugh!
Posted by: Lisa | Apr 9, 2008 11:20:20 AM
That was hilarious...really good for the kinda stressful life we live!!!
Posted by: drK | Apr 9, 2008 11:25:15 AM
Humor in the work forse = Medical Professional with Bandaids
Posted by: Lisha | Apr 9, 2008 12:35:54 PM
I´m from Colombia. In an ER dept, I found the acronymus: PSLM at the last of the medical order (por si las moscas "because of the flies", whe U had the possibility to use another medication, just in case.
Posted by: ivan d | Apr 9, 2008 1:17:07 PM
T.F. Bundy - possible the most unprofessional Totally (Well you can add this one), But Unfortunately Not Dead Yet.
Posted by: Amouse | Apr 9, 2008 2:24:32 PM
So funny...
Posted by: Vera | Apr 9, 2008 2:45:32 PM
Hate accronyms and abbreviations, they're just a pain in the ass for all of us, why can u tolerate it? There's have to be some legal means to not learn all that abbreviations I'd to learn when I came to US!
Posted by: Juan | Apr 9, 2008 3:09:59 PM
In Australia, we often use PFO (pissed, fell over) for our Friday night regulars. Psychs will occasionally (*but not admit to using) use FITH syndrome (*** in the head). Often, there's synergy between the two - the FITH syndrome patients are the ones who come in after a PFO of a Friday night!!
Posted by: Tonia | Apr 9, 2008 6:42:39 PM
I'm sorry to chime in as a spoilsport here.
Acronyms, especially the 'unprofessional' type, do a great disservice to medicine. Not only do they erect a language wall between doctor and patient, but they foster acceptable environments in which patients are objectified.
Those long words we use are confusing enough, aren't they?
And just take a minute to consider whether YOU would want to be cared for by someone who thinks you're CTD.
There are better ways to relieve the stresses associated with being a doc than to make fun of patients.
Posted by: Thomas Robey | Apr 9, 2008 8:19:08 PM
From Family Med:
GOLP = Generalised Old Lady Pains
Posted by: | Apr 10, 2008 8:23:20 AM
When residents are doing rounds, we use the term DKA(Diabetic Ketoacidosis) as a diagnosis to mean Don't Know Anything, especially when relatives are around listening...
Posted by: Paolo | Apr 10, 2008 9:40:08 AM
FOS: Full of S**T (Constipated)
VAARF: VA associated risk factors (for those who've worked at a VA hospital, you'll get it)
Don't freak out folx its not like this stuff gets in the charts (JHACO keeps track of that) its just a way to let off steam and cope with the madness of modern medicine with a sense of humor. Sheesh!
Posted by: TXMD | Apr 11, 2008 7:07:59 PM
IDK : I Dont Know
Posted by: | Apr 13, 2008 10:28:35 AM
Some of the acronyms quite confusing and not 'nice'. I am totally agree with Thomas Robey. Just imagine if the TFTB or the CTD patient is one of your family member. you won't allow u yourself or your collegue to say the words(or write it down).
Posted by: HM | Apr 14, 2008 12:32:13 AM
Amen, Thomas. They're patients, not sideshow freaks. Why use acronyms anyway? If you find a patient's mental limitations (likely due to fear and anxiety) amusing, if you disapprove of a patient's choices/lifestyle or resent treating frequent fliers and drunken tree climbers, why not just put it into words? Oh right, you might be overheard by laypeople. Better use a code. Don't worry, it won't be charted. Please. Wrong is wrong whether or not it's recorded for posterity.
Posted by: George I | Apr 15, 2008 11:11:10 AM
Thomas, thanks for a reality check; you're absolutely right and I apologize for perpetuating these behaviors. Wow, I'm only a second-year and already I'm forgetting my idealized compassion. Y'know, it's interesting--I'm often the one cuffing my husband for using derogatory terms about his patients, but evidently I can get just as caught up in belittling others for humorous effect. I know it's kind of hard to tell in the Intertoobs but I should point out that I'm dead serious--no sarcasm here. Thanks again!
Posted by: Amy | Apr 15, 2008 1:21:57 PM
PIA: Pain in the A** (on the top of records of those patients who uselessly bother you!)
Posted by: Talha | Apr 17, 2008 4:33:35 AM
Funny one from the Peds ER rotation, GLM = Good looking Mom.
Posted by: michael | Apr 22, 2008 9:16:03 AM
TSHL: The Spaceship Has Landed - useful in a variety of situations!
Posted by: TJ | Apr 22, 2008 10:33:19 AM
Obviously, Thomas R. and others who rallied around his warning are correct, but it is my observation that those who are feeling the sting of the front-line sometimes need to be accorded the private right of really stupid humor.
Call to mind so-called "prep-room humor" in the funeral business: If folks only knew what is being said over the bodies of deceased loved ones, they'd probably croak, too. But, once the stress-disguising humor is stated, real professionals get down to biz and do what must be done. And, if they flake out every now and then, so be it--hopefully, it's just in private (though I've seen it in public, too).
Prep-room acronyms for you to figure out:
About a male: OBD
About a suicide: OMHITH
About a female: BFM
It's not just doctors. Now, let's get back to work...
Posted by: rpbell | Apr 22, 2008 6:49:15 PM
got anymore nastier ones? i like the LOBNH - lights on but nobody home... imagining a comatose patient now...
Posted by: its prasad la | Apr 27, 2008 2:39:13 AM
GKN= God knows what...
Posted by: Pinoko | Apr 28, 2008 3:40:55 AM
BBLD- Big Belly Little Dick: Where did it go?
Syndrome making catheterization difficult
Vitamin P- Propofol
La La Juice - Versed
Posted by: | May 3, 2008 9:48:24 PM
